Marriage is a prerequisite to family life, so we cannot discuss Family without making reference to marriage. God instituted marriage as seen in John Gospel Chapter 2. In Gen.1:28 God bless man saying“be fruitful, multiply and fill the earth and subdue it and have dominion over the fish on the sea, the bird of the air, and over every living creature that move upon the earth” that means children and all other earthly things are gift from God. From here you will deduce that God gave man the gift of sexuality and fertility. Children are the fruits of these gifts.
Let us look at the benefits of the gift of children to the family.
Children are source of joy. This can be seen in the life of Joseph. ”Joseph named his first born Manasseh and said ‘it is because God has made me forget all my trouble and my father’s household “the second son he named Ephraim and said ‘it is because God has made me fruitful in the land of my suffering’ (Gen.41:51-52) This joy is not so much appreciated by families that do not experience any delay in child bearing compared to those that it takes years to have their first issue. In (1samuel.1:1-12) we saw Hannah a woman who was made to sorrow because of her childlessness. She did not allow the sorrow to take her away from God but rather it made her to be desperate. But her desperation brought dedication and commitment to God rather than to something else.
Children are gift but with responsibility. Every recipient of this gift must manage it according to the plan and purpose of the giver.-God. This is where use/abuse comes to play. Children are blessing.-Psalm 127:3. God has use them to bless families, they should be made to be a blessing to the family and to others. They are source of comfort and are to be made instruments of comfort. For this to be possible energy must be extended. Work must be done on them. They have to be brought up according to God’s standard in order to escape the wrath of God.
Children are products of sexuality Sexuality as a gift should not be a license for procreation and enjoyment only, thereby down playing on self-control which eventually leads to unintended pregnancies,in the soceity it is labeled “unwanted”. As the name implies, Families make effort to do away with these type of pregnancies, by ,the use of contraceptives and other ungodly birth control methods.. The consequences of this is increase in abortion, abandoned baby syndrome, baby factories, Choosing the gender before birth is also becoming an issue. If the baby is not a male child it is aborted. This was adopted in an Asian country in the past but today the young men have no women to marry.
For children to be blessings and source of comfort to the family, there must be good parenting. This will be well understood considering the following headings: ENVIRONMENT, RELIGION, EDUCATION,.DISCIPLINE.
ENABLING ENVIRONMENT. An enabling home environment is one where the child has all he/she needs to thrive, this include physical needs such as food, clothing, shelter and protection. It is a warm, loving, sensory rich environment where the child’s physical, emotional and spiritual needs are provided for by the family and community.
RELIGION. The family that prays together stays together. Family prayer releases divine power that makes family members stick to one another, love and care for each other. Homes where parents do not have favorites make the children feel loved equally and united. Joseph in the book of Genesis was the subject of envy by his siblings because his father loved him specially and gave him a coat of many colors. The word of God should be shared daily in the home. It brings the presence of God to the home and the joy that accompanies God’s presence becomes the portion of every member of the family. The Bible also provides moral instructions which keep the children and the entire family on the path of righteousness.
FORMAL/INFORMAL EDUCATION. The children should be helped to acquire academic skills and develop good interpersonal skills. This is achieved by talking respectfully to them, being empathetic with them and learning to see things from their own perspective. The family is where you learn to respect other people’s views, spending good quality time together. This has a way of revealing the nature of each member of the family as each person talks about his/her likes and dislikes challenges and fears in life. It is also an important place for parents to teach valuable life lessons to their children by making them know the need to be cautious in the use of language, appreciative in little things, remorseful, truthfulness forgiveness and other values that will make them succeed in life (.proverbs 22 :6,).
DISCIPLINE . Children should be disciplined when the need arises. But this should be done with love The best way to discipline a child is to live exemplary lives as parents.” Do not withhold discipline from a child, if you punish them with the rod they will not die” “punish them with the rod and save them from death” (proverbs 23:13-14) “Endure hardship as discipline. God is treating you as his children for what children are not disciplined by their father? if you are not disciplined-and everyone undergoes discipline- then you are not legitimate- not true sons and daughters at all.( Hebrew: 12:7-8).
In the world we live today, there is no ideal family. The only ideal family that ever lived on earth is that of Jesus ,Mary and Joseph., we need to work hard to make our families if not exactly like theirs but close to theirs. The family is a domestic church. When families are built to standard, then we will have a church and when the church is near perfection then we will have a better society. GOOD CHILDREN ARE MADE
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